I grew up embarrassed by my hair. I grew up believing “good hair” was straight hair. ⁣
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My big hair made me stand out among my friends in suburban Ohio. I hated the “you have so much hair” comments. ⁣
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I hated feeling different. I didn’t grow up with friends who had hair like mine. My hair didn’t fit the norms around me. Black and white salon’s only solution then was to straighten it. {click through to see me with straight hair}⁣

I used to cut my hair in the shower to avoid going to the hair salon. ⁣
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I did whatever I could to “contain” my mane. I wore the tightest ponytails or side braids. Seeing my hair “out” natural was a rare sighting for roommates or Ryan. I straightened it for special occasions like my birthday, school dances or graduation. ⁣
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It’s hard to look back and admit that I only felt beautiful with straight hair. However, the 5 hours it took to straighten for one weekend was never worth it. Straight hair gave me the “Cinderella” effect. A perfect me for one night. ⁣
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My mother never let me get a relaxer because of the damage it did on her hair. I thank her for this because it forced me to see the beauty of my curls. ⁣
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I embraced my curls during Ryan’s first deployment in 2017 (I was 28). I spent hours watching YouTube videos. I bought so many hair products—most of them wrong. I studied my hair & my curl pattern showed up. ⁣
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It became my form of artistic expression every time I did my hair. It became something I was proud of & not something to “deal with.” ⁣
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Seeing other Black and mixed women embracing their curls, helped me stop hiding behind an uncomfortable ponytail. ⁣
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Good hair, is your hair, no matter if it’s straight, curly, thin or thick. Don’t let trying to fit in hold you back from seeing your beauty.