The Uncomfortable Conversation
I remember being afraid to meet Ryan’s family. Will they be shocked to see his black girlfriend? Or did he warn them ahead of time?
Turns out they greeted me with love. But that fear of being the outsider is what I’m fighting against. It’s what Ryan and I are working together to articulate to our sons.
The fact that I still get the question, “What did Ryan’s family think of you when you met them” is proof we have a problem in this country. We are fighting against what’s accepted, assumed & brushed off due to ignorance. I am guilty of accepting things as “that’s just the way it is” but that’s partly why I’m on this platform sharing my life.
This week has brought up a lot of experiences and feelings that I’ve pushed aside for much of my life.
To the boys who wouldn’t date me because of the color of my skin. You missed out.
To the people who stare at me and Ryan when we’re out. I hope you see more couples like us to piss you off.
To the woman at the post office who asked to touch my hair, I hope you learned never to ask a grown adult STRANGER such a silly question (friends you can touch my hair).
To all of my white friends, unsure of what to post or say, lean into that feeling of insecurity. That’s the feeling we feel when we are the only POC entering a church, store or restaurant. Feeling unwelcome or unsafe in a space isn’t fair and shouldn’t be normal for anyone.
This conversation should make us uncomfortable. It’s time to change the narrative. It starts with what you teach your kids about people. Teach them compassion & kindness. Teach them the beauty in differences. Together we make the world better.
